Zylatron - Battle for the Galaxy

Games People Play, 1985, 2-4 players, ages 9 and up. If you go by how long it takes to completely give up on a game as a barometer of its awfulness, then this is easily the worst game we've ever tried. Despite the fact that it is for players nine and up (always a bad sign), we absolutely could not decipher the rules and figure out how to get started playing. After 5 minutes, we said screw it and chucked the damned thing in the garbage. Now, I suppose we might have struggled through if it looked promising at all, but basically we were presented with a handful of very cheap looking game pieces and a very pedestrian looking tactical space shoot-em-up. So, rather than waste any more of our rapidly dwindling time on this planet with this poisonous toad of a game, we chucked it in with the coffee grounds and cigar butts and played a game that was actually fun (and comprehensible). My sincere condolences to any actual 9 year olds out there who get stuck with this flaming turdbag of a game.

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